Hello my lovelies! I am not feeling lovely right now. How is it that we try so hard to be different than our parents and no matter what we do we still wind up doing things we hated? It's even worse when you then see that same attitude or action showing in your own kids. Talk about the circle of life. We can learn so much about ourselves from our children! It's sad when you realize you're mad at your child for behaving in a way that you behave yourself. Ugh, frustrating! Well, it happens to the best of us parents. The only thing I think that's good in the whole situation is that hopefully it's an eye opener for us to work on some of our character flaws. Yes, I have character flaws. More than I'd like to admit. It's really hard to find them sometimes when I'm trying to be the perfect parent and all. Then I get smacked in the face and I realize, wow, am I blind.
I just found out that my son wants to be a professional hockey player but hasn't grasped that we're not born that way and that you have to put in a lot of work to become a pro. Huh, funny. I am that same way. Ideas don't make success. I found that out the hard way over a very long period of time and I still struggle with it. When you work in your head it is hard to put the ideas in action. I see the whole project from planning to execution and it all works in my head but the problem is actually doing it in real time. Being a dreamer is fabulous because there is a new idea every day that is filled with hope and promise but then reality kicks in and, boom, flatlined.
Being a mother of three, soon to be four children makes it difficult for the simple fact that energy is an element that is often lacking. That's my one excuse. I could find many others but they don't really hold water. This one has some validity. Most mothers would agree with me. Except those type A moms who just seem to have it all together. Coffee isn't cutting it and I don't do drugs or energy pills so I'm at a loss. Not a lot of time to exercise and I'm out of shape in the way that working out still feels like work. I'll get to the gym again but not anytime soon.
Having children is such an enlightening part of life. Never did I believe I could I feel so much love and pain, success and failure, gain and loss all lumped together in one experience. It's making me a better person every day. Thank you God! I've been given four little ones who constantly keep me in check and remind me that no, in fact, I am not perfect. No, I do not know everything. However, it is very beneficial to pretend now and then. To stop improving and learning is to die. These little people force me to live.
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